Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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