Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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