Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
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