Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
