where does the pee come out of this thing
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
