hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
