I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
