Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
