It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Randomize
