girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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