why didn't you poke me back
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
