Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Randomize
