turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
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