'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
