Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Randomize
