Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
It's never too late to be topless.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
