Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize