TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
