i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
