'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Randomize
