It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
My penis needs a shock collar
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
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