operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Randomize
