if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
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