just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I got inside last night via doggy door
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
