For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
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