He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Everyone says I win the strip club
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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