omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Please, let me fuck your mom
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
