Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Randomize
