Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Randomize
