boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Randomize
