i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Randomize
