what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
one might say we're banned from that church
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Randomize