Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
