elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
