dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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