Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
Randomize
