The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
