Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
