I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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