Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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