he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
