Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
So. Much. Porn.
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