he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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