I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
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