i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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