Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
