Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Randomize