i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
