I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize