honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
